The Rabbit Hole.....

Do you believe in alternate universes? Do you believe that somewhere between sleep and awake exists that world - a world where tears are fiction and pain a dream; that place where heartbreak is a novel you indulge in and grief is a two-hour movie where, while you jump at scenes and allow emotions to sway, at the back of your mind you know it's special effects, camera tricks and plain old make believe?

If this Rabbit Hole was accessible, would it be a place you'd easily dwell, a vacation of some sorts or would you migrate. It makes me think of What Dreams May Come, with Robin Williams - a movie based on two lines from Hamlet's famous speech - "to be or not to be". And while the young prince contemplates death, he says, "to die is to sleep, and to sleep is to dream, and therein lies the pause for what dreams may come" In this he wonders if to choose suicide, as a means of escape from the overwhelming pain of life,  would suicide be to sleep, caught in an eternal nightmare, if perchance that's the dream you got.

But we're not talking about suicide. Although, I no longer look at suicides as cowards, idiots or atheists. Naaaah, I just empathise, and maybe even sympathise. After slipping in and out of my own "Rabbit Hole", I see suicides as those who were only able to find comfort, love, reassurance and genuine friendship in caterpillars called cocaine, disappearing cats called meaningless flings and affairs, and reality in red painted white roses and therefore got stuck in that alternate universe.

 They may have never crawled out of their Rabbit Hole, and admittedly, we each crawl, fall, or create our own Rabbit Holes at times - that escape from pain, from pressure, from sadness, from anything unpleasant that life plummets us with. For some, their Rabbit Hole is a glass of wine, and Smokey Robinson, or Louis, maybe the smooth notes of Miles. For others, it might be that favourite comforter in the human being that is our safety zone, that person we can always rely on to be just that - a comfort, a safety net, who offers us all the amenities of a relationship, without the physical or intimate webs that trap us. Some even find that Rabbit Hole in the solitude of nature, darkness or private quarters - a space to claim as their own as they just sit, meditate and allow the mind and soul to dance amidst talking flowers and rabbits, to frolic and laugh with Mad Hatters,  or converse around a table of finest delights, where special brownies are served over friendly philosophies and jokes between Bob, Martin, Malcolm and Miriam .... maybe .....

But when reality slaps you like a belly flop from 40 feet, it's no Rabbit Hole when you know for a fact, there are lifeguards, EMS workers, and nurses called "i got ya back" friends to pull you out, administer a lil CPR called sound advice and encouragement, and when your back or belly stings from that flop, laugh with you, asking what the hell were you thinking and remind you of that time in your life, when you're finally at that place you don't have to look forward to the "day" when you'll look back and laugh, 'cause you're already there.

A Rabbit Hole, as metaphorically soothing as it is, can never replicate the touch from one heart to another out of genuine concern. It could never taste as sweet as a glass of wine (or apple juice) between two friends, drinking, eating and then laughing the cancers of life away. And isn't that the sweetest part? When you have gotten to the "remember when" goal, and you can share it with that friend or friends who did tell you then, that you'd get there. That's no Rabbit Hole.

And eventually, that Rabbit Hole disappears, and life gets, not necessarily easier, but bearable and even enjoyable, because your friends are real, and exist in this world. They're a phone call away and not limited to the restrictions of a Rabbit Hole.

Some of us can say that we've been at lows, where just as we were about to crawl into that Rabbit Hole we got that text message, phone call or email, that said, Screw the Rabbit Hole, come chill with me...... And just as karma would have it, we too have been the lifeline to stop someone from crawling into that Rabbit Hole ... maybe even for good.

So here's to genuine friendship, good laughs, needed cries, sound advice, a firm talking to, and time from busy schedules to just say, my mind ran on you... wazzup?